25 years ago, Michael Jackson, Lionel Richie and Quincy Jones created “We Are the World”. This song was written and performed to provide relief to famine-stricken Ethiopians. They assembled a group of 45 artists-most of whom were undeniable legends (Ray Charles, Bruce Springsteen, Stevie Wonder, Smokey Robinson, Paul Simon, Tina Turner…even Steve Perry, Kenny Loggins and Hall & Oates), and people worldwide opened their hearts and wallets to donate to the cause. “We Are the World” became a #1 smash and won Grammys for Record and Song of the Year. Despite the fact that the song itself wasn’t exactly Michael’s or Lionel’s finest songwriting hour, it’s heart was in the right place.

In 2010, “We Are the World” has been resurrected to provide relief for hurricane-stricken Haitians. Again, the heart is in the right place, but this time, the song has become an abomination. I couldn’t even get through the entire video, it was so bad. See for yourself.

It’s really difficult to rag on a charity song. Haiti definitely needs your help, and I urge you to donate if you can. But I’d probably just give a few bucks to charity (or purchase the “Hope for Haiti” CD off iTunes) rather than download this piece of crap. Here are a few gripes (there would probably have been more if I’d have made it more than 2/3 into the song):

*No one who can’t sing without Auto-Tune should have been allowed to appear on this song.

*If the old recording of MJ was going to be at volume level 10 and Janet’s vocal was going to be at volume level 1, what was the point of having her on the song in the first place?

*Wyclef Jean sounds like a dying sheep.

*I’m hip-hop till the day I die, but some songs are better without rap interludes. “We Are the World” is one of them.

*Did we really need Jamie Foxx to imitate Ray Charles AGAIN? Couldn’t they have spliced Brother Ray’s original part in?

*When the most “rock” you get is Isaac Slade from The Fray, you have a problem.

*Dear Lil Wayne: do I really need a convicted criminal who is throwing gang signs on the cover of Rolling Stone singing a charity song? Same goes for Busta “I Don’t Know Who Shot and Killed My Bodyguard” Rhymes.

*Pink, Jennifer Hudson, Mary J., Tony Bennett and Barbra Streisand…I appreciate y’all, but this song is a shit stain on the brand new white drawers of music. Timberlake, Beyonce, Jay-Z, Rihanna, Gaga and everyone else who didn’t participate on this song? GOOD CALL!!!

Michael Jackson heard this song and rolled over in his grave. Sometimes, you need to just leave well enough alone.

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